A Bad Date Idea

Shelton and I have a good friend named John Gordon. He and Shelton went to high school together, and when Shelton went on his mission, John decided to finally investigate the church. He is the proclaimed "adopted son" of Shelton's parents, and Shelton and I decided to make him Mia's godfather when we found out we were expecting. (I know, I know, LDS members don't have godfathers, but we made an exception in John's case.)

Since Shelton and I are old and gray and married now, we naturally are very interested in his social life, since we have none of our own. (Maybe I am just interested in meddling, and Shelton tolerates me, I'm not sure). Anyway, I was thrilled when he called me the other day and wanted to borrow some of our Christmas lights so that he could have an indoor picnic with a date. Good idea, right? It's summer and pretty empty in Provo, and he decided to put them up in the unoccupied apartment that he just moved recently moved out of.

Later that night at about 11:30, Shelton and I have finally gotten Mia to sleep, and we are just about to say our prayers when Shelton gets a call from an unknown number. Who calls a married couple with a new baby at 11:30? So, I listen in as Shelton answers. It's the county jail, and they would like to know if we would accept a collect call from a Mr. John Gordon. Shelton tried to accept, but somehow his phone won't let him, and the call is cut off. Shelton and I look at each other, and wonder what to do. I'm kind of irritated that John would play a prank on us this late at night, but we decide to make sure and call the jail just in case. So, we break out the laptop and try to figure out what the number is for the county jail. Sure enough, there is a Mr. John Gordon there, and he needs someone to come and get him, and post bail.

So, Shelton drives off to Spanish Fork where the jail is located, and I sit and wait and wonder what in the world has happened. About an hour and a half to an hour later, Shelton comes home and gives up the details. Turns out, John's old apartment complex didn't take too kindly to his romantic idea, someone called the cops. John is enjoying a few moments with his date when the cops bust in, separate them, and handcuff John after searching him for drugs, weapons and who knows what else. On the way to the jail, he is repeatedly asked questions about whether he has drugs or was planning on raping his date. He doesn't see his date for the rest of the night.

He is then booked into the county jail, and that's when we received the unknown call. So, Shelton shows up at the Jail, John is able to post bail on his credit card, and is released to Shelton. Finally, John is able to call his date and finds that she was allowed to go home after a pretty detailed lecture something along the lines of "do you know what could have happened to you in there young lady!??" Shelton drops John off, and is finally able to tell me the details, and we've come full circle.

Can you believe it? I mean, yeah, it wasn't the BEST choice to take her to a place that he had just moved out of, but come on, to take him to jail for it? I found out later that John had a previous charge of trespass (pre-mission, pre-joining the church, pre-sanity, really) and I realize that the previous charge made things a bit more complicated, but don't you think that the cop would have realized that if John wanted to do drugs or something inappropriate with this girl he might have found a place a bit more private than the living room of an apartment complex? With Christmas lights for crying out loud?

Anyway, what a bizarre story. John might just be one of the unluckiest people I know. All this happened right after his truck was hit when it was parked (the perpetrator didn't fess up), ALL his clothes were stolen at the laundromat, and he got towed. What a bummer right? He just found out that the complex is pressing charges, and he has a hearing on the 6th. And currently, our Christmas lights are at the courthouse being held as evidence. Don't ask to borrow them.